Self Worth Now!

How many of us are trying to squeeze ourselves into a blueprint of what and who we think we should be?
The blueprint most likely doesn't even belong to us. It could have been shaped and molded by our parents, teachers and significant others around us. Do we really want the things we are currently working towards or are they our perceptions of expectations of others? Many of us have unconsciously learnt to strive and struggle to achieve this blueprint, which by the way constantly changes as we think we have almost got there another hoop appears for us to jump through!

If this sounds familiar your worth has been based on your achievements and not on just having worth. Unfortunately many of us are influenced by a society that bases worth and value on achievement and constant goal post moving. It is not until we really understand that worth cannot be gained in any achievement that we also become aware that worth cannot be removed by not gaining any achievement. This realisation allows the freedom to reassess what our worth is based on! Our worth is innate, it is there all the time and cannot be diminished or increased by what we do, it is an underlying fact. We all have worth!

You may think that the struggle and striving you have been dealing with has to be present to ensure you don't just stop, become complacent and do nothing, but it is that very struggle and striving that wears you down and leads to burn out. When we celebrate our own worth as the person we are right now it doesn't stop us from achieving, far from it, it gives us energy and focus to achieve. After all we no longer have to judge or criticise ourselves for not achieving an outcome we are worthy anyway. We now achieve because we are no longer scared of not reaching our outcome and what it might mean about us. Now that we know we are worthy come what may not attaining an outcome can only mean feedback and we learn to take a different route or change our outcome. How fearless would we all be if we unquestionably knew our worth was a given and could not be taken away?

There is a big difference between working hard towards an achievement because we will then be acceptable and aiming towards an outcome with intention because we are developing and progressing and being the best version of ourselves. It is so much easier to go for it when we maintain our worthiness despite mistakes and mishaps. It gives us licence to take risks, show up and play big! We were not born to play it small!

When we are sure of our worthiness we don't waste energy on others' judgement and criticism. We do not focus on comparison with others or ourselves except to celebrate our progress! There is no value in comparison we are unique individuals with our own paths. Where we are now is where we were meant to be and by accepting our current place we can gain movement. All the while we resist our current status we block our own progress. It is important to accept and acknowledge where we are at and release any judgement of our own worth that we may not have made as much progress as we would have liked and are not where we think we should be. The way forward is open to us when we are at peace with where we are now. Take comfort in knowing you are where you are supposed to be and maybe the previous lack of movement was required, perhaps you were not ready until now to take any further steps. Allow times of stillness become opportunities to rest and assess what has been learnt and gained. Life is not a race, life is now and in each moment. Stop waiting for the next thing to come along and learn the value of just being. Sometimes being still quietens our mind enough to hear important lessons that will lead us further down our path.

When worthiness is unquestionable an easy flow of energy resumes and we become more aligned with our outcomes after all we deserve success! Not feeling worthy causes us to exercise self sabotage. We are most likely to get what we think we are worthy of and therefore if our worthiness is compromised we are likely to act in a way that will wreck our chances of success. However, if we are fully in alignment with our worthiness and our value is secure we are not only more likely to have success, we also become more resilient and positive about any set backs that might occur. This sense of worthiness allows us to focus on fulfilling our needs and we invest time and effort in our health and well-being elevating our sense of contentment and harmony.

Before you set any further intentions or outcomes check how well aligned you are with worthiness. Ask yourself do you deserve to be loved/successful? If there is any delay or doubt in your response it would be worth spending time on boosting your worthiness!

Start noting down any statements that surface about your own worthiness. The following are examples of worthiness lacking statements :

I am not clever enough
I am not slim enough
I make too many mistakes
I don't have enough money
I don't know enough

Ask yourself where you learnt that these things had to happen for you to be worthy?
Was it something your parents/teacher/significant adult said in your infancy?
How do you know it is true?
Have you based your worthiness on someone else's opinion?
What does it say about their sense of worthiness?
If it was never true can you now re-evaluate your worthiness?
Did this belief ever belong to you?

Emotional Freedom Technique is a great tool for letting go of old outmoded and unhelpful beliefs. See the EFT tapping chart using the following link: https://www.e-motionalsolutions.co.uk/downloads

Familiarise yourself with the tapping procedure and work on the statements that you thought were true about your own worthiness. Once worthiness feels more possible real and natural create some positive affirmations you can place in prominent positions. Some examples might be:

I honour my own worthiness in everything I do
Everyone is sacred and worthy of respect especially me
I am everything I need to be just as I am
I don't need to prove my worth to anyone

Imagine what you would look like if you were worthy right now?
How would you breathe?
How would you stand?
How would you sound?
How would it feel if you had worthiness right now?
Imagine now what you are capable of with this sense of worthiness?

The most important element of your life's path is not to wait or search for worthiness, but to start your journey with worthiness!

Karen Oliver
www.e-motionalsolutions.co.uk
karen@e-motionalsolutions.co.uk
07782 381855/01932 403780